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It's making you a little controlling. The sad truth is, for the most part, one must process grief.

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Doesn't matter. You have mended fences as best as you. Stop New York (NY your friend is going to drop dead any minute. He's alive now and it's not your job to impose death on him and widowhood on her, until the time comes.

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Stop worrying about people talking daating you. Maybe they are, maybe they're being petty as hell. It doesn't matter. At some time point, you'll realize trusting and being a friend is far more important than being talked.

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It's a process. You'll get through it. Let grief make sweden man kind, forgiving, full of, and aware that while pettiness is part of the human condition, it's also largely irrelevant.